cornhousehorsewaffleholeshoes
There are certain things in life that we all refuse to do for ridiculous reasons. One of my ridiculous refusals for example, is that I refuse to ever eat at a Waffle House restaurant. I've never darkened the door of a Waffle House and it is one of my goals (however small) to never step foot inside one. So far avoiding "meals" at Waffle House restaurants has not yet been a terribly difficult achievement, but I'm afraid that those who must have invented Waffle House have now invented a game that is sweeping the country, or at least Northern Kentucky and Ohio. A game that I must now ridiculously refuse to play, the game of Cornhole. And here are my ridiculous reasons:
1) Cornhole ??? Seriously, I get that you throw bags of corn at wooden boxes with holes in it, but REALLY the best they could come up with was CORNHOLE?! I suppose it's kinda like Horse Shoes, but the reason they call it Horse Shoes instead of Horse Pole is perhaps because it's a bit less crude. With Horse Shoes, you understand that actual horse shoes play a role but you're not quite sure what else is involved until you attend a family reunion where, until Cornhole, Horse Shoes was largely played.
2) It's not a new idea. It's an easier version of an old game created by Horse Shoe fans that are getting older with the added security that if the grand kids run through the game, no one will be injured. There's also the new individually played version of Cornhole that most of us play every day. It's called Putting Garbage in the Garbage Can or you may know it by its shorter name Throwing Things Away. There aren't many rules and it's very difficult to lose.
I can hear my critics now telling me to loosen up because it's just a fun game. Maybe I should ease up a bit. Maybe I can't really "get" Cornhole until I play a rousing round or two. But isn't that a bit like saying that you can't "get" spandex until you wear it? Oh no, I "get" it, it just makes me uncomfortable.
And if you don't believe me, check these out:
